An Open Letter to the Woman who's Choice Changed My Life

Dear Mother,

You are not my mother, but you are the other mother of my daughter. You gave birth to her nine years ago today. You made a decision, and you let your daughter live. You did the only thing a family like yours was able to do in China in 2003. You, or someone close to you, brought your tiny baby girl to a sidewalk, probably in the wee hours of the morning. The person who placed her gently, wrapped in many blankets, likely hid somewhere to make sure this tiny baby was found. Indeed, she was. She was taken in to a hospital only a few blocks away, and examined. The way she sucked down a bottle offered to her, they realized she is one tough little girl, and off she went, on the path that would eventually bring her to me.

I can't even imagine the pain you must have endured, knowing you had to give up this child you had carried inside your body, being one with her, nourishing her for months. I know you will always remember her. On her birthday, I wonder if it makes you sad to think about what it would have been like had you been able to keep your baby. So, though I know you will never read this, I am writing it because I would like to be able to express my gratitude.

Daisy (that is her English name) came into our lives in August of 2005. She was a feisty little girl, 18 months old, still eating with great gusto. She proved that she could love and be loved very early in her relationship with her new family. When she met her three older brothers, she took over running the household. People always say, Daisy's future suitors are going to have a tough time getting past her brothers. Actually, Daisy's brothers are going to have a tougher time getting Daisy to approve of their future girlfriends.

Daisy is a hardworking, artistic, sweet, helpful, assertive, friendly young lady. She loves school, and works very hard to do well. She is eager to please. She draws and paints, and loves crafts. She is almost always happy, but she is not a push over. She will stick up for herself, and is not afraid to tell other people what to do. She is a good friend to others, and she has good friends too. She loves to dance. I wonder, what of these traits do you share with her?

She is tall and beautiful, and healthy and happy. She likes to be a girly-girl and a tomboy. She is in fact, a wonderful child in every way I can imagine, and I just wanted to share a little bit of who she is becoming with you, dear lady, who's impossible selfless decision made Daisy part of my family. Thank you.

With love and gratitude,
Daisy's other mother